Pi Shawl & Pancake People

Pi is progressing, but since its 40" or so of beauty are squeezed onto 24" of circs photography is challenging.

This was two days ago, but I'm still on the 288 st/rd section, though nearing the final repeats now. I've been overcome with the need to personalize the 576 st/rd section, so I spent a restful (to my hands and arms) evening on Monday browsing pattern books for complementary patterns and edgings. I've got it narrowed, but not absolute. Will share soon.

Finished the felted bag handles and have been using it every day. I know I should have done I-cord handles, but I was just too lazy. Instead I cut long lengths of both yarns twisted them together, twisted again, then felted. This yarn didn't hold the twisting well at all, so it's pretty lumpy, but the thickness is right, the colors are well mixed and, most importantly, it's done! This bag has turned out to be a great size because it holds two smallish projects side-by-side so I can pick up either as desired. Without a clasp it probably wouldn't travel well, but I don't use it that way. Can always sew one on later.

That's Deli peaking out. Some rows added, but not a particularly exciting visual difference at this point.

Don't know how this happened, but more laceweight found its way into my stash!

Lorna's 50% silk 50% wool Helen's Lace. Sorry the label is so over-exposed, but otherwise the yarn was too dark to see the colors, which are pretty accurate in this photo. Still choosing the pattern.

End of knitting content

As you can tell from these photos, May Malaise (to be followed by June Gloom) has arrived and it's overcast most mornings now. FYI to anyone every planning a vacation to the San Diego Co coastline:  avoid late May and June. There's a very predictable weather pattern where the marine layer is thick over the coastline every morning, usually burns off for midday, then returns like clockwork every afternoon. Personally I love it, but it might bum you out if you were planning a vacation of frolicking in the waves and enjoying drinks with umbrellas while watching the sunset.

I'm feeling like a Pancake Person

I've been thinking a lot lately about ethics, religion, ego and other constructs of human consciousness. Far, far beyond where I want this blog to go, but I'm going to throw some links below and you can follow - or not - as your interests dictate. No particular order or even connection beyond that they're interesting to me.

First, from a discussion on Edge.org:

But today, I see within us all (myself included) the replacement of complex inner density with a new kind of self evolving under the pressure of information overload and the technology of the "instantly available". A new self that needs to contain less and less of an inner repertory of dense cultural inheritance—as we all become "pancake people"—spread wide and thin as we connect with that vast network of information accessed by the mere touch of a button.

THE PANCAKE PEOPLE, OR, "THE GODS ARE POUNDING MY HEAD"
Richard Foreman

This really jumped out at me. Sometimes I'm overwhelmed by the sheer volume of things vying for my attention, other times I'm thrilled with the availability of so much information. I'm trying to take in so much, yet build "inner density." The Edge site is full of interesting reading that I'm just beginning to wade through.

Errol Morris' web site. I saw The Thin Blue Line in 1988 at an art house theater in Louisville and I've been excited by this man's unique art ever since. Very interesting site including his ad work.

WikiQuote can be a thought-provoking time-suck.

On the bedside table:  Status Anxiety by Alain de Botton. Just started this, but it fits so well with what's floating around in my head right now.

There's more, but I need to help a whining, crying, teeth gnashing seven year old who can't for the life of her figure out how to just DO IT! She wants every drawing, every piece of writing, every creative endeavor to match the perfect image in her mind. She's the classic perfectionist frozen by her inability to meet her self-defined standards. We've always seen this in her and have worked over the years to give her tools to deal, but she is still sometimes incapacitated by it.

I taught art in her class today and the teacher pulled me aside to send this project home since everyone else is done and it's part of a parent's night display tomorrow. He told me he's held her back from recess and other activities, but still she just sits there. This is from the kid who's generally a good student and is great at math and science. It's the creative stuff that puts her over the edge.

At this moment, right next to me, she's yet again fallen into dramatic tears wailing "I can't do it!" over and over. I'm on the edge myself. So you don't think me too cold - I spent an hour with her this afternoon having her tell me her "vision" and then working through logical steps of project execution, all of which she's now ignoring. We're on hour three of this play now. Decided to remove myself from the drama for a while by writing this.

Not asking for solutions here, but rather explaining why I'm drifting. Just re-read this post and it's so vague and poorly realized. It's no wonder the great thinkers and writers were always men - kids and complex thoughts are incompatible.

Must go knit. A lot.

Comments

[Shawn]

feel for you girl!.....some of our offspring can be sooo anal about stuff. Carleigh is soooo perfect about some stuff...other crap she could care less about...argh! Drew is just lax about most stuff in general. Think I'm gonna look into that book...sounds interesting.
Have a glass of wine, knit and relax!
hugs

[michele]

I enjoyed your post...the felted bag is lovely and so is the Helen's Lace...I've been toying with 'finding' some of that too. And as far as the perfectionist child...I have a 9 year-old girl with whom I've had similar experiences as yours...Hang in there...I like Shawn's suggestions --wine, knit, relax...

[la chica alta]

Thanks for the quote about the pancake people. It is so true. Nice knitting...over 500 stitches...wow.

[Susan]

You have probably heard of this one... but just in case - to get people out of a rut, or those unable to produce.... challenge them to make something really ugly.

[juno]

Your thoughts are plenty well expressed. The particular angst you are describing is stretched and formless anyway.
I love the Edge. I go there sometimes when my head feels stupid and I need an idea wake up call.

[Risa]

Your pi is really going to be spectacular. I'm looking forward to seeing what personalization you're going to add to it.

That lorna's lace yarn is simply gorgeous. I've fondled a bit of it at Purl recently but so far have been able to withstand its siren song. The huge stash of laceweight already at home probably has something to do with that :)

Sorry about the frustration. My youngest sister was also a perfectionist in that same mold. She never brought any "art" home from school because it never matched the ideal vision she had in her head and tossed the result. I wish you luck and patience in this task. Oh yes, wine and yarn too.

[Moni]

I love the "pancake people" quote. That pretty much describes me accurately :). I need to learn how to focus.

I love your pi shawl! those colors are gorgeous!

[Janet]

Your Pi shawl is lovely! I love the colorway of the Joslyn's yarn. What size needles are you using?

[DeAnn]

I've been wanting to order the treebark colorway for eons but can't figure out what color it really is. Your colors look completely different than the colors on their website. And the small sample I have looks different from both of those. Can you tell me in words what colors you think treebark is???

[Jeanne]

Isn't it ironic that the joys and wonders of knitting blogs can actually contribute to this "pancake-ness"? I find my own thoughts and aspirations stretched more and more thinly the more that I read, and yet I don't want to stop. I'm spending more time reading archives lately than knitting.

My own five-year-old is in a similar phase. You should see the sock she made -- colored in stripes, cut out in a wonderful Seussian shape, all from her own imagination, as I have never yet knitted a sock. Yet sometimes she will refuse to try a new project for fear that she "can't do it." I always thought I was a patient person, but it's amazing how frustrating for me this can be.

And your Pi is looking lovelier than before. I wish you many happy, meditative, and restorative hours creating it!

[Daryl]

How many of us have that child either in us or living with us who wants so badly for the result to be perfect, that we can't even start. The battles are getting less in our house, but at 10 and 13 and 45 they can be ferocious. For some reason we need to achieve tears to get the release to be able to just do it. I only wish I had learned to do it at 7, not in college when I didn't hand in a paper on time for an entire term, always exactly a week late, cuz I couldn't just START.

[Sara]

I can relate both to your information overload thoughts and to your daughter's paralysis of perfectionism... I pretty much do what she's doing at the start of every new design project, unfortunately. It's so painful.

Last summer my elder stepdaughter gently suggested that her dad and I read an article in her healthy living magazine. It was all about how information overload can contribute to feelings of overwhem, even depression. There's always more out there to read and learn. I need to dig it up and review again. I've been trying to slowly weed email newsletters out of my inbox, but then I'll go subscribe to 5 more blogs. Too much!

[Kay]

My 8 year old has similar angst. It was worse in First Grade though. She would sit there writing her letters and erasing them for some invisible imperfection over and over. Her second grade teacher has really helped her and now she just lets fly much more often. Still takes forever on the longer creative projects, which begin to feel like the Sistine Chapel after a while.

For written work though, it really helped when she got the concept of 'drafts' and 'revisions'. I.e., the draft is where you just get it all on the page, and the revisions are where you tidy everything up. Wish I could get that concept myself.

xoxo Kay